50 Ways To Kick A Habit
Whether you are able to attend our fabulous and weird funeral sing-along event this December 31, 2009, please feel free to sing our songs at the top of your lungs. May this reconfigured tune inspire you to make that change before the change makes you.
50 Ways to Kick a Habit
Sung to tune of 50 Ways to Leave Your Lover
Stolen without the permission of Paul Simon
(Get the tune via karaoke or lyrics.com)
The problem is all inside your head
She said to me
The answer is easy if you
Take it logically
I’d like to help you in your struggle
To be free
There must be fifty ways
To kick a habit
She said bad habits are a pattern
That intrude
But there are some tricks to lose them
With a cheerful attitude
And I’ll repeat myself
At the risk of being crude
There must be fifty ways
To kick a habit
Fifty ways to kick a habit
Chorus:
Stop blaming your mom, Tom
Don’t need to hate dad, Tad
Just have to accept, Shep
And get yourself free
You don’t have to cheat, Pete
Just turn off the cell, Nell
Start telling the truth, Ruth
Just get yourself free
Stop looking for fault, Walt
Don’t pass the buck, Chuck
Stop living in fear, Dear
And you can be free
Refrain:
She said it grieves me so
To see you in such pain
But there is something you could do
That would make you smile again
I said I appreciate that
And would you please explain
About the fifty ways to kick a habit
She said just find a place
To dump out all your junk
Bad habits, grudges, grievances
That get you in a funk
And then she chanted them
Like a sly old Buddhist monk
Yes there’s fifty ways
To kick a habit
Fifty ways to kick a habit
Chorus:
Get to the gym, Kim
Toss out the smokes, Bloke
Start eating more kale, Dale
Just get yourself free
No more chasing skirt, Burt
Stop blaming the man, Dan
Quit blowing your stack, Mac
And get yourself free
Give up the old pain, Jane
Open your heart, Bart
Just learn to forgive, Liz
And you can be free
